What Does It (Really) Mean to Be a Feminine Woman?

When you heard the word femininity, what comes to mind?
There was a period in my life if you had asked me that question I would have answered something like: being quiet, reflective, wearing dresses, etc. 
Growing up, one of the harmful messages I hd to let go and undo over time was unhelpful messaging about what it meant to be a little girl, to be feminine. 
There are very particular memories I have where my mom would repeatedly remind me to be a good girl, a quiet girl and act ladylike. 
"Remember," mom would say to me, "Nobody like a loud girl."
While her intention was not to hurt me, my sensitive Patty heart absorbed unhelpful (and unhealthy) messages about what it meant to be a girl.
As I have gotten older, I can see how this instance was one of the most hurtful messages I absorbed as a little girl and carried with me into my early twenties.
What I heard in those words was, "Be different from who you are. Act a certain way or people will not accept or like you."
"Being loud equals being bad."

Why share such a personal story with you?
Because sometimes I feel in Catholic circles there is a false perception of what it means to be feminine, to be a woman.
To be feminine is never a one-size fits all prescription. It looks different for every woman because we are all unique and none of us are the same.

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