06 April 2016

Life lately + why you just gotta eat the fish eyeball.

"Life is a daring adventure or nothing at all." 

Helen Keller is associated with these words. A woman born blind and deaf, still managed to seek out and experience her life as a daring, beautiful adventure. 

This past week I find myself associating with her words right now where life has me. Life feels and looks like a daring adventure for me, even amidst a broken kind of beautiful.

On Sunday I ran my second half marathon. While I overslept, was running a little late, and didn't feel like I ran my personal best, I still did it. I ran across the finish line feeling like a champion that can kick a%$ anything life throws at me.

I have started a new small group at my church, and am really enjoying. It is yet another reminder of how much I belong; just another broken soul seeking after the heart of God like everybody else.

This week my divorce was finalized. A sad painful day, but a day filled with such great peace and comfort. Standing in front of the judge felt so surreal, but I knew Jesus was right up there standing with us. I was really humbled by all the love, prayer, and supportive messages from people in my life throughout that day. My pastor even sent me a text message telling me he was praying for me. Knowing I am not alone is such a comfort, and makes the bad days a little easier to get through.

The same night my siblings and I enjoyed a night of delicious food, good drinks, and just being together. I cannot imagine any other people I'd rather help me close this chapter in my life. As the night went one, we ordered lots of different dishes on the menu. Have you ever eaten 9 or the 14 entree's on a menu? Well, we did :)

At one point it came time to enjoying a whole cooked piece of trout, complete with scales and intact eyeballs. Known at times as a picky eater in my family, my sister encouraged me to eat one of the eyeballs. While I gagged it down with a slurp of hard cider, I was glad I did it.

You know what? Sometimes you just gotta eat the damn fish eyeballs!

Take a risk. Live on the edge. Be spontaneous. Have an adventure. Maybe for you it doesn't look like eating the fish eyeball. Maybe its starting that blog or submitting your free-lance work. Maybe it looks like traveling without an official agenda or forgiving that one person who still doesn't get how they hurt you.

Life is an adventure. A messy, painful, beautiful adventure, but an adventure nonetheless. I don't have as much certainty as I used to about my life. Things aren't as color-coated or mapped out as I used to obsessively do. And that's okay. 

I am learning I am not really in control. God is slowly teaching me what radical dependance on Him looks like in small moments of everyday life-not just in the big plan of life.

Seek out the adventure in your own life, take some risks.
Go find and eat the fish balls in your own life. In the end, you'll be glad you did.

I promise. I know I am :)

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  1. You inspire me just by being you. Praying for you, especially this week

    1. Oh Emily, you are so sweet! XOXOXO Thanks friend:)

  2. Patty, you continue to be in my prayers. And I possibly will never, ever follow your advice (like eating real life fish eyeballs). Haha! Your story reminded me of when my family and I went on a trip to the beach and my dad ate one of those eye balls...my sister and I (around 9-10 years old) made a scene in the entire restaurant - like full on crying, screaming for that poor fish and his eyeballs that my dad had just eaten. :-( Haha! Needless to say, I don't like eating fish. I am not THAT spontaneous. ;-) I hope you are doing good!

    1. <3 LOL! That's too funny because my brother sitting next to me, leaned over and advised me to not make a big scene...which I didn't ;)

  3. That quotation by Helen Keller is so awesome! Patty, you are incredibly fantastic. You have been in my thoughts and prayers a lot lately, and I am so glad to hear that God has been dumping peace on you and your life in the midst of the pain. I hope that the divorce being finalized has helped bring some closure, and I will continue to be praying for you as you journey forward!
    And kudos for eating a fish eyeball. You're absolutely right-everyone's gotta take some risks. I don't know that I'd be able to gulp down a fish eyeball, but maybe someday I'll get to find out! (and I know my husband would in a heartbeat haha).

  4. Love you and your brave heart! "Do not be afraid!" :)


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