Nobody got fat from too many banana's

One of the leaders at a recent Weight Watcher meeting told this to our Monday night crew:  "Nobody ends up at Weight Watchers from eating too many banana's or over-doing it on the low-fat salad dressing.  We're all here because somewhere along the way, our relationship with food got out of hand."

My relationship with food has been an interesting one.  For one, I like food.  I am fan of eating; especially sweets.  I can remember the first time I thought I was fat.  I have done a fair share of diets and work-out gimmicks in my almost 29 years.  Towards the end of high school, I did the Atkins Diet and got down to my lowest weight ever at 145-140 pounds.  I thrived on no carbs all the time.  I used babysitting money to go to the health food store to buy low carb bars and treats. 

My parents started getting worried, and I can still remember the night they sat me down and said I needed to start eating a more balanced diet.  I was devastated.  I did not have a healthy relationship with food, and it didn't help I just got a job at Panera working in the bakery; the pounds quickly piled on.  I didn't know how to interact with food in a healthy way.  When at my highest weight in college at 195 lbs I knew my relationship with food was off.way.off. 

So I decided to start the new year right by heading to Weight Watchers.  After loosing 35 pounds, I felt I was turning a corner.  I was starting to learn about what a healthy relationship with food looked like.  My clothes fit better, I felt more confidant, and how I viewed food was changing.

Fast forward to the present-July 2014.  Since loosing (and still maintaining!) the weight lost almost 8 years ago, I have been getting lazy in staying committed to being healthy.  I quit going to weekly WW meetings and would honestly rather eat dirt than exercise.  I wasn't tracking my points and my weight loss had really fizzled out.

About a month ago, I read a great book by Jennifer Hudson (American Idol turned WW spokesperson) and it was a kick-in-the-butt I needed to wake up and realize why I wasn't where I wanted to be with my health; because I stopped caring and wasn't making it a priority.

I decided to start going to weekly WW meetings again.  I need that accountability.  AND I added the dreaded e word into my life; exercise.

 

I detested exercise something FIERCE.  Sure, I would have occasional stints of "gyming it up" but nothing seriously committed to staying fit.  So this time I decided to go big or go home; which for me meant take up running.  

Since May, I have been training with Couch to 5K and surprise, surprise am actually really loving it?!  Folks.  I have NEVER stuck with any type o' exercise this long in my life.  I just finished week 5 and after week 8 I graduate to being able to run 3.1 miles.  Saturday I just ran 20 minutes straight. for the first time.since high school.   I probably looked like a complete fool dancing around and fist pumping it up afterwards, but it didn't phase me one bit.  I felt so proud of myself for doing something I never thought I could do.  I have pushed and stretched myself a little more each week; and its paying off in more ways than one.

Running three times a week along with tracking my WW points and staying accountable for what I eat is helping me get back on track.  I have never liked the word 'diet'.  For me it screams deprivation, non-tasty food,  and is very limiting.  I'm thinking Teresa would agree with me.

For me it wasn't all them banana's that made me gain weight.  I stopped caring.  I emotionally ate.  I wasn't thinking about what I was putting in my mouth or if I was even hungry.  This is no longer about finding the right diet.  I am so done with that crazy making.  Exercise and WW are becoming a lifestyle plan for me.


As I have gotten older, I am slowly learning to be more gentle and patient with myself...learning how important it is to care for my physical body as much I would my spiritual health. 


And amid all the ice cream, cake, banana's and low-fat salad dressing that bit of truth is so.so. good for my soul.