What's the difference between band-aids and life-support?
Band-Aids are a temporary fix to heal something little and minor, like a paper cut. If you put a band-aid on a gaping wound, it does nothing to heal or fix it. Life-Support is much more drastic and intense. It involves complicated, intricate procedures to help an individual.
As I have read the headlines about Josh Duggar, and others like him, my heart breaks and grieves for their families, but I'm also reminded of the reality that the Church needs to more ardently give Christians life support in the face of these sins and enemies, not just band-aids.
This isn't just about Josh Duggar. It's about the Church standing up and doing battle with evil itself.
When it comes to this whole Ashley Madison scandal, yes its very sad, but more than anything it
angers me.
I'm angry because at almost 30 years old I have heard 1 sermon in my life on the evils of pornography addiction.
I'm angry that only when a big sex scandal like this comes out do people start talking about sexual sin and acknowledging it. The rest of time there is no discussion of it, because sadly it has become a socially acceptable and even "normal."
I am angry that my faith tradition (Catholicism) still in many ways is silent on these issues when it comes to preaching in church on a Sunday morning. I am angry when well-intentioned people make idiot statements in ways that don't help the issue.at.all.
I am both angry and sad when I see young people I know struggling and getting caught up in the web of sexual sin. We as a Church need to stop avoiding and start talking about the messy.painful.difficult. stuff. This means preaching about affairs, divorce, pornography/sexual sin, and other difficult issues. Not talking about the messy stuff only gives it room to grow and destroy families.
I know there is a wide array of thoughts towards the Duggar family for SO many reasons.
This sad reality of leaked information about the secret life of Josh Duggar is a staunch reminder that pornography, infidelity, and sexual sin are rapidly becoming a growing problem in our culture.
Over the last week, I have found myself thinking of Anna Duggar and her young children.
I cannot imagine the pain and shock she must feel and trying to manage it all with three little ones plus a newborn baby. I pray she finds help, healing, and the right resources. I pray for her courage, wisdom, and discernment in the coming weeks and months. I pray she gets proper counsel from the proper people. I'm praying for Anna Duggar not because I'm a fan or even that I necessarily agree with her, but because she too like me is a wife and a Christian.
And yes I pray for Josh Duggar too.
I pray he wakes the Hell up, repents, and changes; but not by just reading his Bible or doing manual labor but that he chooses to enter into recovery for himself, his wife, and his children.
I pray he realizes the damage his selfish choices have done to his family.
You can hold whatever opinions you want on the Duggar family and even Josh himself, but might I ask you to say a prayer for his hurting wife and children today? Because they are the ones that have to deal with these life-changing realities moving forward. No wife wants to wake-up the to reality her husband cheated multiple times, but to do so in the face of great public scrutiny is unimaginable to me.
Sin is real. Evil exists. Our choices always have consequences. With all that in mind, let's stop avoiding the messy. Rather, embrace the painful realities many of our brothers and sisters sitting in the same pew as you are battling.
Part of being church is to walk with each other through the painful mess of life.
And the mess of sexual sin doesn't need anymore band-aids.
I have written before here about the power of the word serenity and what it has been teaching me. Serenity is something I will be be working at the rest of my life, but I am slowly starting to see how real, daily serenity is changing my life in ways I never would have dreamed.
One of my favorite authors and most interesting people to follow on social media is Fr. James Martin. Fr. Jim Martin is a Jesuit priest who writes about everything from Ignatian spirituality to the culture. He is one of my favorite people to follow on Twitter and everyday tweets a sermon!? #waycool
A friend recently sent me this new, updated version of the Serenity Prayer, which Fr. Jim Martin wrote. And I thought it was way too good to not share here:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, which is pretty much everyone, since I'm clearly not you, God. At least not the last time I checked.
And while you're at it, God, please give me the courage to change what I need to change about myself, which is frankly a lot, since, once again, I'm not you, which mean I'm not perfect. It's better for me to focus on changing myself than to worry about changing other people, who, as you'll no doubt remember me saying, I can't change anyway.
Finally, give me the wisdom to just shut up whenever I think that I'm clearly smarter than everyone else in the room, that no one knows what they're talking about except me, or that I alone have all the answers.
Basically, God, grant me the wisdom to remember that I'm not you. Amen.
-Fr. James Martin, SJ
One of the biggest lessons life has taught me so far is learning to accept I cannot change or control anyone in this world, except little ol' me. I have wasted SO much time in life getting frustrated about difficult people in my life or getting a lesson in humility that I should yank the plank outta my eye first before going telling another person about the beam in their eye.
No I am not God. Sometimes I both hate and love that at the exact same time. Constantly being reminded that I cannot change others and only have control over me continues to be a reality check. I'm constantly reminded that I cannot change/look at others without seriously looking at myself first. Walking in the way of serenity is a choice to make every single day, and some days are easier than others. Deep down though, I am slowly learning the path to growth and insight comes with surrender and constantly realizing I am not in control.
I'm not in control. You're not in control. And even though sometimes that sucks, its actually a very, very good thing.
While Jim is busy enjoying some new essential oils this week, I have been busy making our first batch of homemade laundry detergent.
I first looked at this recipe and had planned to go with it. But being a newbie, I thought it might be good to ask a friend her thoughts to see if I left anything out. Well good thing I did, because apparently I was lacking a very basic ingredient, soap. Specifically a laundry soap called Fels Naphtha. Yeah say that 10 times fast.
So there I am sitting on the porch with my 5 gallon tub of laundry soap, half done right. #pathetic Because I made such a large amount I had to run back to the store for 8 bars of Fels Naphtha soap. I came home, found a cheese grader, and started shredding. Have you ever got writer's cramp from shredding soap? Well now its a real thing.
8 bars later plus a lot of mixing, Team Hubbard has now plenty of laundry detergent for easily the next year...and maybe then some.
Lesson's learned??
- Start out small-don't make a huge batch only to realize its missing a key ingredient
- Use a blender/food processor to make Fals soap into a powder, grating got old way fast
- Don't break the cheese grader (see above)
If you're wanting to start making your own laundry soap, use THIS recipe by Amy. This woman knows what she be talking about.
And if you're in the area, swing by our place! We've now got laundry detergent coming out our ears would love to give you your own batch. Thank you and You're Welcome:)
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