The greatest lesson I ever learned from pro-life work

I was in college: young, stupid, self-righteous, and thought I was always right.

I was spending the afternoon with a friend doing what I thought at the time was positive work in the pro-life movement.

We were standing outside of a local grocery store holding graphic images of aborted babies. I really believed and bought that mentality I had often heard from some people involved in pro-life work: "America will never end abortion, until they see abortion."

Lots of cars drove by us standing their on the public part of the sidewalk, some honked and gave thumbs up and some  were angry and yelled four letter words at us. I still remember that one Dad who came up to someone in our group. I didn't overhear the whole conversation but it was something to the effect this father was very angry his young daughter had to be exposed to something so graphic at such a young age.

At that time in my life, I would have thought something to the effect of: "Well that's too bad for you buddy. But sometimes the truth is ugly and it hurts! You gotta just deal with it." Looking back over the years, I am not proud of thinking that and regret it deeply.

One of the greatest lessons that has helped me mature and grow as a Christian woman is being aware of the self-righteous, better-than-you attitude that has often gotten me into trouble, or at the very least given a bad impression of Christians as a whole.

In my younger and less wise days, I have thought that the delivery of the truth doesn't really matter. It doesn't matter how I act or the words I use, because sometimes the truth hurts. And if someone doesn't like? Well, then that's their issue. I didn't like to admit when I was wrong, or the very least accept criticism on how I handled or responded to something.

Last year I wrote about why I personally am not crazy about the use of graphic abortion images in public. I'm really not trying to get into a debate on the use of graphic images, but rather reflecting on my own experience and why my self-righteous attitude at the time has changed how I look at this. I am not saying that all people who use graphic images of abortion are horrible people, but me personally I wonder at how effective that style is.

I have found when you're dealing with people who disagree with you on abortion, a graphic image forced in their face is hardly going to help having a respectful, peaceful dialogue on the issue. In some ways, it can further push people apart and be more polarizing.

One of the greatest lessons I ever learned when dealing with people who are on the opposite end of the spectrum, HOW we deliver the truth matters. Our words, attitudes, and yes I would the images we use matter. And sometimes the WAYS and HOW pro-life people can deliver that message sucks. Sorry but its true. Yes we speak the truth, but if love isn't in our attitude and actions, we have already lost the battle.

One thing I have struggled with in attending the March for Life are the many graphic, even horrific images that line a certain part of the walk. For me, its too much and I know one time seeing an aborted baby is plenty for me, those images I ever saw have never left me.

When my Mom first explained what abortion was as a young child, she was very gentle and chose her words very thoughtfully. She didn't just starting throwing at me pictures of dead babies, that would have been an awful lot for a little person to take in. And I think sometimes the way graphic images are just used is not necessarily helping the mission. 

I believe deeply in the cause of right to life issues; not just abortion, but the death penalty, euthanasia, infanticide, etc. I have raised money for crisis pregnancy centers and grown up spiritually adopting unborn babies. This is a cause I believe in. But I also deeply believe in having respectful, loving attitudes and interactions with those who disagree with me.

And at the end of the day, I wonder how much graphic images help or hurt the mission of pro-life work.

Please join me today in praying for the hundreds of thousands of American peacefully marching in the capitol to speak up for those who have no voice.

Its supposed to be about life...not death

Today marks the anniversary of Roe vs. Wade, the case that 41 years ago made abortion legal on demand in our country.  This is the first time in seven years I will not be attending or taking a group of young people to the nation's capital to peacefully march and pray for lives lost and affected by abortion.  I like to think I am there in spirit praying with those in Washington DC.

I am pro-life.  I have grown up spiritually adopting unborn babies, praying outside abortion clinics, raising money for crisis pregnancy centers, and supporting homes for women who help them keep their babies/get their lives on track.  I'm not trying to convince a pro-choice person to change their perspective, BUT rather I'm reflecting on my own experience in the pro-life movement and why I think one tactic I have seen regularly {the use of graphic images in public}over the years perhaps doesn't quite send the right message intended.

When I first learned what abortion was as a child, I remember my Mom explaining it very gently to me.  She was basic and didn't go into all the details but kept it simple and straight to the point.  She didn't show me images of dead babies or broken mangled bodies with parts barely attached.  I think graphic images used in public settings can scare children and force them at a young, vulnerable age to see something they really are not ready for. 

What parent would let their young child watch a horribly gruesome or graphic horror movie?  Yeah we know the blood is fake and the actors are pretending, and even though it is not real, does that mean you would let them watch/see the real thing?  Of course not!  The pro-life cause is about protecting all innocent human life, and that should include little ones who are not ready to see those graphic images.

Pro-life advocate Abby Johnson used to work for Planned Parenthood until leaving it behind to create a ministry to help workers in the abortion industry who wanted to leave.  As a woman who formerly worked for PP, she has an interesting perspective in a great article on why abortion workers actually love those graphic images.  Sound weird? Give a read, you may be surprised as I was.

Many studies on violent video games and movies have shown over the amount of times we see/are exposed to them, we actually become desensitized to them.  I would say that can be true of seeing graphic images of abortion.  When I first saw an image of an abortion for what it was, I was shocked and scared.  I cried, it was heart breaking; both for the mother and little one.  But the day I start to feel 'comfortable' or don't even flinch looking at that broken little body, that means my heart has become hardened; just as a person who constantly sees violent video games or shows becomes hardened to what they are watching.  We should never become hardened in hearts to evil, to death, to pain and suffering of the vulnerable. Yes, I believe people should see a graphic image of abortion as a sobering reality of what it is.  However, that needs to be done with prudence and thought as to the individual and what difference would this image make to help them understand...not just using it for shock value.

One hard lesson I have learned as a young adult is taking great passion, excitement, and zeal for something I love {my faith} and coming across as an unkind, not very loving Christian.  It was more about getting out my point and being right, than really thinking about my delivery or just talking things out in a calm, respectful manner.  I cringe looking back at my attitude as a 'baby' Christian, but am thankful for being humble enough to admit it and to have learned from times like that.  I have had to learn in more occasions than one that wisdom by Dad shared with me when I first got into youth ministry: yes its important to know your faith and be able to explain it logically, but you also have to be pastoral with people.  If you are not pastoral, you'll loose them.  And for me that has been SUCH a good lesson to learn not only for work in ministry, but just for the real world in general.

Today as hundreds of thousands of Americans are peacefully marching in the nation's capital, they will pass by sections along the way where very horrific images will be shown of what abortion is.  I pray people will not just casually glance at such horror.  I pray those who use graphic images in very public settings will be mindful of those who could/do see those images, and how it cause more harm than good.

The battle on abortion is truly a real battle, one of life and death.  Me personally, I find more value in focusing on life not death.  The lives of women affected in the aftermath, women have no help/resources when finding themselves in an unexpected pregnancy, and yes, on the lives of those human babies.

Its supposed to be about life...not death. 
So please leave your graphic images at home.

We live in a crazy, weird world...

...where the killing of children is legal.  Crazy, huh, that a culture like ours which is supposedly so smart and rational to allow such a thing to happen.

Jim and I had a long conversation last night about the whole trial of Kermit Gosnell and that horrible case that is in the news from Cleveland.

Gosnell was an abortionist who was charged with 3 first degree murder charges of cutting the spines of babies who were born as a result of his botched abortions (even though many more than 3 babies died in his 'care').  In Cleveland, several women were kidnapped for years; abused, raped, and held prisoners.  Some had children, and now details are coming out that the man who held these women beat them so badly during some of their pregnancies that it caused an intentional mis-carriage....I'm reading reports here and here that some want to hold first degree murder charges against this man for the deaths they intentionally caused on those mis-carried children.
here's the crazy weird part, folks.  hold onto your socks.

So how are those mis-carried babies of the women who were abducted in Cleveland any different than babies who were born as a result of failed abortion attempts??? I mean come. on. Science doesn't lie, look at the facts.  Either those "fetuses" are little human persons or they are not.  Gosnell was convicted in the murder of three babies, BUT if he had done it just a bit earlier, it would have been perfectly legal.  But now, some folks are demanding justice for the lives of babies who mis-carried in the Cleveland case.  Does anyone else see all the crazy in this?!

Let me go a step further.  Most of you probably remember Laci Peterson?   She was 7 months pregnant when she went missing and was abducted, and her body and the body of her son were found in a lake not far from where she went missing 3 months later.  The sadness and outrage of Laci's family/friends led to led Congress to pass the Unborn Victims of Violence Act (also called "Laci and Conner's Law"). So a law was created to honor the lives of Laci and her son, Conner; which basically states if a pregnant woman is murdered, a suspect can be tried for two charges of murder: the mother and the child she carried.  So basically there is a law in state that characterizes an unborn fetus as a "human", but at the same time Roe v. Wade which is the law of the land in the US says an unborn little person is not human and has no rights.
I really believe that if the media talked about this Gosnell case, it would absolutely destroy the the rationale and logic for having abortion on demand in our nation...because once you look at the science/logic of it all (in my head), I just don't really see how it works.

And so our conversation over this horrific case in Cleveland, the whole Gosnell case, and even remembering Laci and Conner Peterson have got me thinking and praying more and more...on what we have to do to accomplish and be the change you want to see in the world.

From Sandy Hook to those women in Cleveland who suffered greatly, we have MUCH to pray for justice/healing/peace/hearts to be changed in our world...

A Modern House of Horrors=A Bored Media

The more I read about this absolutely horrifying story of Kermit Gosnell's "house of horrors" it truly makes me sick to my stomach and cry many tears; tears women who were victimized/died and tears for the little ones who become nothing more than another number whose lives have been lost to abortion. 

Almost as horrifying as this story is, the fact that this story is not on many mainstream media outlets is a complete. total. injustice.

When 'The Today Show' finds more value in sharing on the new and latest sex toys for couples over such a story as this, that leaves me blown away and quite appalled in terms of what our country considers 'good' reporting and journalism.

Here are some places where you can read more about this story:

• http://www.slate.com/blogs/weigel/2013/04/12/kermit_gosnell_the_alleged_mass_murderer_and_the_bored_media.html

• http://m.usatoday.com/article/news/2072577

• http://www.lifesitenews.com/news/infant-beheadings-severed-baby-feet-but-media-still-ignoring-gosnell-trial
• 
  

Bonnie shared these words on her blog this afternoon from the Overview at the Grand Jury hearing regarding the trial and charges held against Dr. Kermit Gosnell.  These are a mere stating of the facts that happened:

This case is about a doctor who killed babies and endangered women. What we mean is that he regularly and illegally delivered live, viable, babies in the third trimester of pregnancy – and then murdered these newborns by severing their spinal cords with scissors. The medical practice by which he carried out this business was a filthy fraud in which he overdosed his patients with dangerous drugs, spread venereal disease among them with infected instruments, perforated their wombs and bowels – and, on at least two occasions, caused their deaths. Over the years, many people came to know that something was going on here. But no one put a stop to it. 

 Let us say right up front that we realize this case will be used by those on both sides of the abortion debate. We ourselves cover a spectrum of personal beliefs about the morality of abortion. For us as a criminal grand jury, however, the case is not about that controversy; it is about disregard of the law and disdain for the lives and health of mothers and infants. We find common ground in exposing what happened here, and in recommending measures to prevent anything like this from ever happening again. 

You can read the full article here....

The point here is that the media on a vast level is completely ignoring this issue!  This is really the problem: a doctor (and I'm using that term very loosely) intentionally and knowingly killed babies born alive at his abortion clinic facility.  That's murder last time I checked.

This is evil.inhumane.disgusting.  And to top it off, nobody is saying a word.

NBC, CBS, ABC, civil rights groups, women's groups, the freaking medical community....where are all you, nobody saying anything!?!?  Instead of red little medical waste bags, imagine small white coffins.  No need for politics.  Cover the story.  Please don't be shy and speak up on this! 

President Obama, I know you and have different views on this issue of abortion, but how can you not speak up on this particular case?

Imagine if Gosnell had been butchering up puppy dogs and kitty cats instead of babies. There wouldn't be enough freaking parking for the satellite news vans and trucks.

Why am I and many others outraged and beating this dead horse?
Because the media would cover the beating of a dead horse and not this. sad. but. true. fact.